Craziness..

Well, as the title suggests, the past 6 days have been totally nutty.. Honestly, I can't even begin to explain everything that's been going down in my life..  But it basically equals no working out, and some (not 100%) bad eating..

I've been thinking a lot over the past couple days, and I realized that the words "I Promise" don't really hold any stock to me.. I just say them and don't realize that when I don't hold up that promise, a little bit more of my credibility goes down the toilet.. No wonder so many people don't ask me for help..  I let all sorts of people down, but most of all, I keep letting myself down..

Why is it so easy to let ourselves down??  I hate letting others down, but myself.... nah.  That's okay with me.. Not anymore.. I need to be careful what I say and start putting meaning behind things.. 

Today was my Weight Watchers weigh in.. last week, i gained.. this week, despite my lack of exercise (and somewhat bad eating), I lost 1.8 lbs.. The first thing that ran through my head?

Imagine what that number could have been if I'd tried hard..

Seriously, if I can lose 1.8 lbs not trying, what could I have lost with exercise and good eating habits??  I'm gonna find out this week..  And I'm proud of myself for going to my WW meeting this morning, bc I seriously was debating not going.. but I know that's a slippery slope..

OH!  As of tomorrow, I will be posting more pictures.. I bought a Sony digital camera at hhgregg on Black Friday.. $50 camera and I LOVE IT!!  I can't wait to start being more accountable with it, and posting pics of EVERYTHING I eat..  I'm thinking I'll post again tonight with what I've eaten today, seeing as it's my Jared Day (subway for "breakfast" and lunch)..

I'll also post later more about accountability..

Challenge Accepted!!

Well, this is different.. Two posts in one day?!  Has hell finally froze over?!  lol.. nope, I just saw something on Twitter that I just had to put my hat into the ring.. Ann over at Twelve-in-Twelve has made her own version of the Runner's World Run Streak 2011 Challenge..  if you are interested, here's the blog entry that has the info on it.. :)

Now, the basic premise of this is to run 1 mile/day from Thanksgiving Day thru to New Years.. and while I may not be a fast runner, I sure as hell can run, dag nab it!  lol.. This might be just what I need to kick my weight loss in the butt.. especially after my 4.2 lb GAIN this past week..  Yep, I said it.. I gained 4.2 lbs this past week.. and while a couple is prolly bc that TOM is here, but I know that's it.. the rest was up to bad choices and no exercising..

But I'm not giving up.. I'm plowing through that and hoping to see some (if not all) of that gain gone next week.. even with Thanksgiving coming up..

What the Hell?!

This week has me all screwed up.. Seriously, I'm just so confused as to what day it is.. And I totally forgot about a Skype date I had with a friend last night.. WHAT THE HELL?!

I hate feeling like this.. lol.. honestly, I hope it gets better now that I'm back on my anxiety/depression meds.. I started off at 20 mg, and will go back to my regular 40 mg dose in about a week..

So hopefully, this blah feeling I have and the one that makes me addicted to sleep go away soon.. if not, guess my doctors appointments will have to be longer than I thought.. Oh yeah, I can't wait til the 5th of December.. that's when I get my glasses back.. YAY!!  and the 16th is when my doctor's appointment is and hopefully I'll get back on my Vyvanse (my ADHD med)..

I'm still confused about my benefits with therapy, but it is my goal to find out before the end of the year and get my food addiction (yes, I'm pretty sure this is why I'm so terrible at losing any significant amount of weight) under control..

Fed Up on Friday..

Lol.. Nice title, huh?!  Yep, I'm fed up.. WITH MY MOTHER!!

I'm seriously wishing I had the funds to move out now.. I hate that I feel this way, but like previous entries about my mom, I'm still feeling like she's pulling me down when I'm trying to go up..

The last straw this time??  I bought a 3lb bag of chicken breasts to cook for meals over the week.. and like I'd said yesterday (either on here or Twitter), I planned to go home yesterday and finally cook them.  They'd been defrosting for a couple days (prolly since Sunday), but I figure 3 1/2 days wasn't that bad to be in the fridge..


She did me a favor and cooked them for me.. I was really grateful, and was sure to thank her for doing it.. and then I realized why she cooked them: she left me 3 breasts and put the rest in BBQ sauce (which I won't eat, bc of the P+ values).. WTF?!  And when I tell her that I needed her to buy me another bag of chickens, she FLIPS out on me.. My mom doesn't drop F-bombs unless she's pissed..

And I know she only blew up bc she knew she was wrong.. I wanted to walk out of my house with my stuff right then.. she is constantly criticizing my diet moves.. Yes, I ate a roll of Ritz crackers today, but I also tracked them, so I'm using some of my weekly points.. I came home to a potato "toppin" which is a baked potato with butter, broccaoli, bacon and velveeta ontop.. with loads of sour cream.. Anytime I decide to say something, she flips out too.. I just can't win for losing..

I can't help but think all of this will be so much easier when I'm out of her house.. everything will be easier once I'm out.. ugh!

True Confession THURSDAY..

So, I missed True Confessions Tuesday.. instead, I'm breaking "the rules" and doing it Thursday this week.. :)

I confess.. that I am super excited to have lost a pound last week.. I was worried, as I didn't have any kind of activity and had 36 hours of bad eating (not straight, but you get my meaning right?!).. but I'm learning how to eat a lot of fruits and veggies..

I confess.. that tonight I plan to cook as many meals as possible with a 3 lb bag of chicken breasts.. lol.. I got lots of Chicken Helpers, and I plan to make some with low fat cheese and salsa for tonight.. Lots of easy stuff to re-heat..

I confess.. that my schedule isn't so busy that I can't blog anymore.. Now it's just a habit not to blog.. I'm working on blogging again daily.. baby steps.. baby steps.. :)

I confess.. that I miss Blog Hops.. seriously, they seemed to be everywhere earlier this year.. then they just went away.. :(  I may just have to have one.. hmm, what an idea.. lol

Followers.. Yeah, YOU!!

I just realized that I have no idea who some of my followers are.. So here's my chance to "get to know" you..

Leave any or all of the following in a comment, or feel free to email me at fabchallenge gmail com

** Do you blog? If so, please leave me your blog address so I can follow you..

** Are you on Twitter? If so, what's your twitter handle?? Mine is @fabchallenge (bet you didn't guess that, huh?!)

** How did you get here? Please be honest, I'm intrigued.. :)

** If I changed anything about my blog, what would YOU like to see? Besides my lack of consistency or willpower.. lol

Feel free to be honest.. you can be brutal, you can be supportive.. just realize that I reserve the right to bitch/complain/brag about whatever I want.. hehe

I truly do <3 my followers..

OOooooooo, I think it may be time for a giveaway.. Maybe after Thanksgiving..

Week 3 Update

It's Week 3 of my Weight Watchers journey..

Weigh In: 255.4 lbs
Difference from last week: -1 lb

WOOHOO!! Seriously, after scarfing 4 cupcakes on Saturday, I was a little scared that I wouldn't show any kind of loss.. thank goodness I had been good all the rest of the week..