Saturday, December 14, 2013

Confusion.. Depression.. And The Future..

As I sit here, wondering if I'll have to take this cute dog back to the ASPCA (instead of finding him a good home), I get so mad.. and really sad..

I really wish I could keep this cute dog..


 I really wish I had the time to spend with him like I should..

I really wish my ex hadn't left him with no issue..

That last part pisses me off like no other.. He doesn't even ask about him when he (stupidly) texts me..  How do you want this dog so bad, and then leave him without any other thought?!?!  Makes me realize what kind of parent he'd be..

The depression is trying to overwhelm me, but I'm kicking it's ass, I think.. Until a sad movie comes on or I hear or see something that makes me think of "what if"..  and then it's like a flood comes out of my eye balls..

ON A HAPPIER NOTE:

I applied back to college as a returning student.. Hopefully I'll hear something soon and will be able to enroll for Summer 2014..  :)

I have decided to start saving all my change and $1 bills.. Started a couple days ago and have already saved $40+.. And since I no longer have a checking account, I have to use just cash for everything.. And when money orders won't work, my mom is gonna let me use her debit card..

It being the end of the year, I've made my "goals" for 2014.. And I will make this year my bitch.. and honestly don't have any intention of being in a serious relationship at all this year.. But then again, I've learned when you have plans, God laughs at them.. So I'm open to whatever..

Welp, I'm going back to watching Christmas movies and wrapping more presents.. :)


2 comments:

  1. Awwww :( You know I love you and I'm so glad that you're making some goals. I hope the pup gets a home soon. And as someone else said, seems like you dodged a bullet with him! HUGS!

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  2. I LOVE reading your blog!!! Keep it up! You have a real talent for writing, and I LOVE the brutal honesty! I LOVE you, and am so proud of you!!!

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